yes, so it would seem that the friends were right and catching with him last night has done nothing other than set me back a bit :-(
not happy...and mainly with myself...
not sure why i thought it would be a good idea really?
well that's not entirely true......small part of me was hoping he'd beg me to take him back, small part of me still really fancies the idea of a relationship with him and of course a bigger part of me still likes him, which is made more difficult in some way by just how well we are getting on at work, which is what started this all in the first place....
why must I meet and be attracted to men who aren't ready for the sort of relationship I want and are emotionally unavailable or unwilling to commit?
yep, that is a pattern I really have to break...
so, tonight, a day after our catchup, I'm sad...not inconsolable like I was weeks ago, but sad none the less
and of course we didn't talk last night, he didn't raise and for once neither did I...but then I did get a text later...."thank you for dinner. We didn't really talk and I'm not really sure we need to unless you think otherwise and frankly we were both tired anyway. I think we seem to have settled into getting on as friends at work, which is good. My only question is where we stand on out of work comms"
sooo who knows really? I don't think I want to be friends but I seem incapable of cutting him off....although last weekend with almost no contact was actually nice....
maybe that's a sign!?
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